Story Time...

I wrote this on the plane last December on my way to San Francisco. I have been meaning to post more but life kind of got in the way.  Reading this over reminded me of how aggravated I was when I wrote it...

So why do the most retarded people find a way gather around me. It appears that I attract two things when I travel, mosquitoes and retards. After my excursion into the scum breeding grounds known as China, I find myself in a seat on a plane to San Francisco beside a crazy woman. She decides to take off her shoes and socks and sleep in some fucked up cross-legged position taking up more room than necessary. Her feet are in uncomfortable proximity to me. She also rubs and picks at them. She's giving them the works as if she was in her living rooms. I'm on the aisle seat and this bitch is pissing off both the guy in the window seat and myself. The dude at the window seat is kind of weird too. In the middle of the flight he gets up, goes to the aisle, takes his bag out from the overhead compartment and starts unpacking in the middle of the aisle. Meanwhile, I stand there waiting for him to finish his picnic so I can let him through to his seat. Where do all these inconsiderate idiots come from? I know, China mostly, but I am still baffled by the existence of such discusting beings. There have been a number of funky smells on this flight so far. Right now it smells like a very unclean vagina. Someone already farted twice on this flight. No sleep for me this time...