Saturday 14 January 2012

Story Time...

I wrote this on the plane last December on my way to San Francisco. I have been meaning to post more but life kind of got in the way.  Reading this over reminded me of how aggravated I was when I wrote it...

So why do the most retarded people find a way gather around me. It appears that I attract two things when I travel, mosquitoes and retards. After my excursion into the scum breeding grounds known as China, I find myself in a seat on a plane to San Francisco beside a crazy woman. She decides to take off her shoes and socks and sleep in some fucked up cross-legged position taking up more room than necessary. Her feet are in uncomfortable proximity to me. She also rubs and picks at them. She's giving them the works as if she was in her living rooms. I'm on the aisle seat and this bitch is pissing off both the guy in the window seat and myself. The dude at the window seat is kind of weird too. In the middle of the flight he gets up, goes to the aisle, takes his bag out from the overhead compartment and starts unpacking in the middle of the aisle. Meanwhile, I stand there waiting for him to finish his picnic so I can let him through to his seat. Where do all these inconsiderate idiots come from? I know, China mostly, but I am still baffled by the existence of such discusting beings. There have been a number of funky smells on this flight so far. Right now it smells like a very unclean vagina. Someone already farted twice on this flight. No sleep for me this time...



2 comments:

  1. Hehe, it's Vic's alter ego again. I love it! But I totally get that, why are people so freaking annoying when they fly? They are probably completely normal and the second they sit down on the plane, they become such idiots. Most of the time, the person beside me takes not only the armrest (for the whole flight), but another 10cm of my space. And when asked to please move, I generally get the answer "But you are small and need less room". That is true, but it's MY space and i enjoy being "little". So after many flights, I have learned to defend my space, whether it is by painful pokes with my elbow or kicks, annoying and persistent little shoves when I just have to keep scratching my arms. Yet it always annoys me that people can't just respect something they generally would if they were on the ground.

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  2. Oh and I totally love how you took a pic of them. Haha, that is so great!

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